Lent: Week 1 Recapitulation

As I said, it's the Lenten season. It started a week ago yesterday and I haven't done all that great. But God forgives. Just last Sunday an elderly woman, we'll call her Gertrude, asked me how my parents were doing. I was sitting at a table eating some churchsalad, churchlazagnia, churchveggieconcoction, and churchcake with churchlemonade. We were having our annual all-church dinner wherein we talk about where we've been, what we've done, and where we're going. "Oh they're fine," I said. "As fine as anyone can be during these finacial times, you know? ha ha... But they'll pull through." 
"That's nice, that's nice, say hi to your mom for me."
... 
Did she forget that my parents split ten years ago? Must have. I mean, she is old, like way old, like so old I don't know how old. She really is a sweet old bag bones though. Thin white wisps of hair delicately placed to cover any thinning spot, elequent of speech, graceful, wardrobe of floral pastels and Battenburg lace, face like a birthday cake full of plastered color shining bright and reflexive, emaciated by age, but carrying a smile that says, "Do you need a grandma? I'll be your grandma." (As a matter of fact I do, both of mine are dead.) 
The way she said, "And how are your parents doing?" implied that she was curious about their current state as a collective. I just didn't have the heart to tell her the truth. Enter, THE LIE. 
Secondly, I got my hairs did on Tuesday and the librarian at work said she liked it. As she turned to walk out of the teacher's lounge she shot from the door these words: "Hope your girlfriend likes your new look!" Then the door shut behind her. 
So I din't lie, per se, but I didn't provide the truth either. I just let it be to avoid the "actually we broke up in November...oh sorry to hear that!...yeah...why did it end?...I fell in love with her mom" conversation. So not a lie, but kind of like deception, a little?

And finally, I've realized how truly hard it is to break the foul mouth habit when you live with this guy:
(don't worry these are all really short, it doesn't take much)

Ham Is Dumb Pt 1. from Momoney on Vimeo.

Ham Is Dumb Pt. 2 from Momoney on Vimeo.

Ham Is Dumb Pt. 3 from Momoney on Vimeo.

Ham Is Dumb Pt. 4 from Momoney on Vimeo.

Ham Is Dumb Pt. 5 from Momoney on Vimeo.

How could such a being NOT bring forth colorful, foul, vulgar, nasty language from all humanity? Am I right?

It's my cross to bear, living with Ham, I believe it now, just jewels in the ol' crown, know what I mean? Jewels in the crown.

I just hope I can make it to Easter with out losing it completely! Maybe I should rent a hotel room somewhere...